"The LORD is my light and my salvation, whom shall I fear?"

- Psalms 27 : 1

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Relationships : Dishing Out The Digits

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Dishing out the digits. We've all been there. You know, that situation where a certain brother stops you in the middle of the street, perhaps on your way home, or a colleague, or school mate voices their desire to collect your digits.

But what do you do? I always cringe these situations. It's not really the giving the digits that's the problem, it's what giving it is supposed to mean or what the brother might want to follow. Looking back now, I can say I have really been in some awkward situations. Personally, I dislike giving out my digits to a total stranger but I can say it does depend. A relationship can come from different angles, yes we have to be open to that but when a brother stops you in the street and says he likes your flow and drops the question about your digits, what are you supposed to say? How are you supposed to react?

I really don't have one answer and it's not the law but all I have are points to guide me and help you other ladies out there. Firstly, I  look at how the brother is dressed and the sort of gear he has on. Let me just say that I do not judge people by how they dress but in a situation like this, it helps me have a superficial idea of the brother.
Secondly, I try not to answer any personal questions the brother might throw at me. We all have to be careful and not start telling strangers about our lives.
Thirdly, I give my terms. Do not go making the brother think you are interested when you are not. Be clear and say you are not interested in any such thing if it's the case.

In the case where it's a brother you already know, I'd give my number but when he talks about a relationship or going out, I prefer to voice out my thoughts and be clear 100% from the beginning.

That's my take on dishing out the digits. All I can say is that be careful and do not feel pressured. Often times we feel so pressured and we just give it out. But if anyone wants access into your life, you have to be 100% okay with it. So don't go around thinking you have no choice and you always have to bend when a brother asks for your number. Do what you want. Do what's best for you.

How do you handle situations like these?
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6 comments:

  1. This has happened to me several times since I have been married. I have had some really bozo's look at my ring and say something like "your man must not want you cause your all alone". I personally would advice self respecting young women to ignore strange men that approach you on the street. They only want one thing from you.

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  2. oh emm gee....something funny happened to me today.
    In target , i was in line..purchasing PANTY LINERS..yes ladies,,,tha liners. and a dude comes up behind me like " ok..if i tell u sumthin you CANT TELL ANYONE.." im like.. uhhh" do u have herpes" ?? lol( well i thought that, didnt vocalize lol)

    and he goes " my brother is behind me and he is really shy but he would like to get to know u sometime"

    COMPLETELY..AND UTTERLY WRONG TYPE OF APPROACH!
    first off if i didnt have a lovely caring BF, i still wouldnt give u OR ya silent brother the time of day.

    if u have confidence, show me. do NOT get ur little brother to speak or act for ya lame behind.

    the dude MUST convey the right level of respect and confidence in himself WITHOUT being overly cocky..brothers have a hard time finding a middle point :-)

    love the topic of discussion!

    www.itzspittingglitter.blogspot.com
    Joi

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  3. lol...I always give my old number out.

    If we've held a conversation and you didn't just stop me out of the blues, we actually hung out, then I might consider my secondary email address.

    lol...u can never be too careful

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  4. @ JenJen : You are right, ladies should not entertain such men at all! I personally walk away, far away. The attitude of the man is certainly important.

    @ SPITTING GLITTER : LOL! That's wrong. I totally understand. He has to be confident and respectful without being boastful and proud. Thanks for dropping by sis and sharing your experience.

    @ H : Yes! Much more convenient. Yes, conversation is certainly good before dishing out the digits.

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  5. I think most people give our email addresses now because the idea of a stranger calling you is kinda odd! People text so much nowadays that they don't realize that this potential person could be weird/stalkerish lol

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  6. @ The Retro Natural : I see what you mean sis lol!

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